When drinking with Vietnamese hosts, join the greeting, follow the first toast and take part in the conversation. You can decline alcohol, skip a refill or toast with a soft drink. An invitation to share a meal does not oblige you to finish every glass or match someone else’s pace.
The word nhậu describes a social gathering around drinks and food. It can mean an informal evening at a beer restaurant or a longer meal with friends, family or colleagues. Customs vary between groups, so these six notes explain what you may encounter and how to respond comfortably.
1. Choose your drink and decide whether you want ice
Bia hơi is fresh draft beer, particularly associated with northern Vietnam. It is different from ordering a named bottled or canned beer. If you have a preference, ask which beer is being served before accepting a refill; do not assume every glass on the table contains the same drink.
Ice may be offered in beer, but it is a preference rather than a rule of Vietnamese hospitality. Ask for “không đá” if you want no ice, or “ít đá” for less ice. If the beer is not chilled and you do not want ice, ask whether a cold bottle or can is available.
You do not need to accept a drink that concerns you to appear polite. If you are unsure about the ice or the way a drink is handled, choose an unopened chilled drink. Avoid unlabeled spirits of uncertain origin, and do not leave your drink unattended.
The word rượu can refer to alcoholic drinks including distilled spirits. A small cup of clear liquid should not be treated as a small serving of beer: ask what it is, and decline if you do not want it.
2. Follow the first toast without treating every sip as a ceremony
At a group meal, wait briefly for your host to welcome everyone before starting. People may raise their glasses together, clink with those nearby or direct a toast toward a particular guest. Watch the table and follow the gesture that is comfortable for you.
A smile and a raised glass are enough when someone is too far away to reach. Formal celebrations may involve several rounds of greetings, while a casual dinner may be less structured. You do not need to wait for a group signal every time you drink water or take an ordinary sip.
3. Recognize “Một, hai, ba, dô!”
“Một, hai, ba” means “one, two, three.” The phrase “Một, hai, ba, dô!” functions as a shared “cheers,” often followed by everyone raising their glasses. You may hear slightly different sounds or an extended chant, depending on the group.
Join in if you wish, but do not interpret the chant as an instruction to drink a fixed quantity. You can raise water or a soft drink, smile and take a small sip. The social gesture and the amount you drink are separate choices.
4. Treat “100 percent” as an invitation you can decline
“Trăm phần trăm” means “100 percent.” At a drinking table, it can be a call to finish the glass. You may also hear “cạn ly,” meaning to empty the glass. Neither phrase creates an obligation.
Set your preference early, before repeated refills make it harder to communicate. A friendly, short refusal is clearer than accepting another drink and hoping to avoid it later. You do not need to invent a medical reason or promise to drink more next time.
- “Tôi không uống rượu bia, cảm ơn.” I do not drink alcohol, thank you.
- “Tôi uống nước thôi.” I will just have water.
- “Tôi uống một chút thôi.” I will only have a little.
- “Thôi, cảm ơn, tôi không uống nữa.” No, thank you; I am not drinking any more.
Let the person pouring know that you do not want another serving. If a companion keeps insisting, repeat the same refusal and ask a friend to help explain. You can thank the host and leave if the pressure continues. Respectful participation includes respecting your own limits.
5. Make the food part of the meal
Food is a central part of many nhậu gatherings. Beer restaurants may serve substantial shared dishes such as grilled chicken or fish, vegetables, tofu and fried rice, alongside smaller snacks. Menus differ, so ask what the group is ordering rather than expecting a standard set of “drinking food.”
You may be offered unfamiliar ingredients, including shellfish or offal. Ask what a dish contains and choose according to your preferences. Being a guest does not require trying every item, and a plain-looking vegetable dish can still come with a meat or seafood-based sauce.
Explain dietary restrictions before the shared dishes arrive. If you have a serious allergy, show a clear Vietnamese translation naming the ingredient and ask about sauces and shared preparation. Choose another dish or venue if the staff cannot clarify how the food is prepared.
At a restaurant, check the practical details before the bill grows:
- Ask whether a seafood price is per plate, per piece or by weight.
- Clarify portions before ordering a whole fish, chicken or large shared dish.
- Check whether drinks, extra snacks and service charges are separate.
- For a gathering among travelers, agree how to divide the bill before ordering.
If a host has invited you, ask discreetly whether you can contribute rather than assuming either that everything is free or that everyone must split the bill. Keep a payment option the restaurant accepts; ask before relying on a foreign card.
6. Arrange a sober ride before the evening starts
Vietnam prohibits operating a road vehicle with alcohol in your blood or breath. This is not a rule that begins only when you feel drunk. If you plan to drink, leave the rental scooter, motorbike, bicycle or car parked and arrange another way home.
A taxi or a booked car is the practical option for a night out. Save your accommodation’s exact address on your phone before leaving, and check the pickup point when the restaurant is inside a lane or a busy pedestrian area. Confirm the vehicle and driver against your booking before getting in.
For an evening outside the center, arrange the return journey in advance instead of assuming a car will be available immediately. Ask your accommodation or restaurant to help with a taxi if you cannot book one yourself. Choose a sober driver; do not accept a lift from a companion who has been drinking.
If you left a rental vehicle at the venue, agree where it can remain and retrieve it later when you can legally and safely drive. Do not use a fixed “wait an hour” rule to decide that you are fit to ride.